January 16, 2002
future
age: 52
gender: female
A few months ago, I lost my job and the love of my life. I am a professional career woman (married), but have been unable to find work or any real feelings of happiness since September, 2001.
What's in my future?
We all wonder about the future...and we all experienced a palpable depletion of energy on September 11th. From a psychic perspective, there was no way to avoid having a sizable portion of energy submerge into the unconscious...where it is not lost, but transforming.
The loss of a job is always a frightening experience. We all require a healthy CashFlow. The loss of a relationship is also disheartening...but to speak in terms of loss is disempowering. To say "I lost...the love of my life...." is to use a perfectly natural, but devastating phrase. We all understand it to mean that a relationship has ended...but it also means that one no longer loves one's own life.
I can't predict the future...nor would I want to. That would imply the absence of Free Will. I do understand, however (as we all do) that the future is simply an outcome based on the Present. In that sense...what we do here and now is what determines our Future. All we can do in the Present is to simply love our own life.
In the situation this querent describes...the sensation of loss is best understood as a time in which an enormous amount of energy that once flowed out into the world...into career and marriage...has now entered the underground stream of her Personal Unconscious. That energy has not been lost to her...she has simply discovered the fact that it is no longer to be found in the job and relationship she once counted on to bring her happiness.
Psyche continues to move and to flow. Energy is neither created nor destroyed. The Source is always available...but when it no longer flows in the channels we once relied on, there is no choice but to look within and listen for the subtle signs that indicate in which direction to continue. When the well dries up, we naturally imagine that the next step is to begin drilling somewhere else. That may be fine in terms of mundane reality...but in terms of the Psyche...we are still living in a much more generous and pre-industrial period. Drilling is only necessary if we can't locate a more natural Source.
Psyche is the stuff of fairy tales. It is not magic...we only describe it as magic and fantasy because we rarely allow ourselves to pay attention to what's going on within...unless we get knocked on our butt. When the waters of life cease to flow from one opening...it's time for us to find them again. In this instance, the best method of searching involves eliminating the use of the word "Loss." Also...at least momentarily...cease looking for work or happiness. Just looking into Psyche is hard enough work...and having the time to look is an extraordinary luxury.
Follow whatever you find there.
kristo